GUESS WHAT?!
I'm procrastinating and NOT doing calc homework. What's new? *smirk*
Oh english, you are such a funny language. If i were an illegal chinese immigrant, i would shoot myself trying to learn the english. All these stupid rules you have to go through.
Like all the different forms of plural: goose and geese, cat and cats, mouse and mice, and applesauce... is just applesauce. Is all that really necessary? Can't we just add an 's' after everything? Gooses, mouses, cows,
applesauce... s. That would make life a WHOLE LOT EASIER.
And what is the deal with "My friend and I"?? What is wrong with ME AND MY FRIEND?! I want to come first in the damn sentence, so I will talk about ME FIRST, thank you very much.
Or words that can mean two or more completely different things. Take the word "Bear":
"Look at that brown bear in the forest!"
"Bear in mind that you need to get an 85 on your next test"
"Bear to the right to avoid that kid"
Seriously? If i really was an illegal chinese immigrant, if someone said to me, "Bear in mind that you need to get 85% on your test," I would be thinking, "What. the. fuck." (In chinese, of course). Then I'd go out into the woods, hunt down a bear (cause, I'd be a total ninja like that), and slam that motherfing bear on my test paper.
Also, what is it with english slang?
I remember sitting in bio class last semester and some dude walks by in the hallway outside shouting, "Hey, guess what?! Blahblahblahblah!" And the dude he was talking to goes, "SAY WORD!!" and the first guy replies, "WORD!"
I laughed out loud.
And the term, "what's up?" I know everyone uses it, even I do. But when you stop to think about it, it's such a funny way to ask someone what's going on in their life.
Chinese immigrant is asked by an english man, "what's up", immigrant looks up at the sky and wonders if the english man is an idiot... or blind. I can totally see that. That'd actually be cute. =)
Anyway, let's just say that english is an unnessecarily complicated language and that illegal chinese immigrants will never be able to cope with it.
"Bee's knees" has to be the funniest slang i've ever heard. It's even better than "struggle buggy".Labels: APPLESAUCE, chinese, Illegal, immigrant
