Define Your Thoughts

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Movement

Can we just lock ourselves in the studio, blare the music, and get lost in that open space?

Ice petals

The 22nd of January dawned bright, but cold. The inside of her window was brushed with ice. Delicate, frozen swirls patterned the glass as she stumbled out of her empty bed, groggy and slightly shivering. Her phone blared 9:05 am, as it began it's 5th snooze cycle. She dashed out her door - 25 minutes until class. It's day 2. Yet it somehow has felt like a week since Monday night. Curious how time likes to play tricks on the human mind.
Keep moving - her mantra for the week. Idle time allows her to think. Right now, thinking is no good. It swallows up her thoughts with emotions she'd rather not face.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Commitment

I think that's what it boils down to: commitment issues.

A little bird that just wants to fly freely and perch at various trees for a short period of time... until the right tree is found to build a nest and make a home in.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Effort

I'm trying, I really am. It's hard though. I really hate feeling like I'm dependent on someone.

I wish FnM and dance classes were still in session. I miss the relaxation and concentration that comes from dance. Dancing by myself in front of a reflective surface just isn't the same.

In other news, I made the FnM exec team. I'm the new marketing and promotions exec! I'm so excited to get back to FnM and work together with the new team to make FnM bigger and better than ever before. =)

The exec team already has a slogan for me: "Because I'm Steff Chan".

Come to FnM! ... Because I'm Steff Chan and I say you should.

Doesn't matter what anyone else says, things just work... because I'm Steff Chan.
Hahaha.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

I'm scared. Scared of being in a relationship.
I haven't been in a relationship in so long that I can't really remember what it's like... and that frightens me so much.

I remember warm fuzzy feelings, smiles, having someone constantly there for you...
But I can also recall sadness, confusion, the never-ending effort and dedication, completely trusting someone.

How on earth can so much trust, feeling, and effort be placed in a single person?

Letting the person in, allowing them to know so much about yourself, giving so much to that person... I don't know if I'm ready to do that for someone...

Especially since I enjoy being single. It's quite fun. ;)

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Quickly

Human emotions are funny, annoying things.
It's irritating how in a short moment, they can change from one extreme to another.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Who gives a f*ck?

I've hit a wall. A wall with a big sign plastered on it. The sign reads, "I DON'T CARE". Which is really quite unfortunate because I've got some pretty important things I need to get done.

It is now Thursday March 29th, 1:26am

Exhibit A: FnM exec interview at 12:30pm today. I need to have a proposal and 2 creative components ready. What have I done? Nothing.

Exhibit B: AC job interview Friday at 4pm. Have I done any prep work? Nope.

Exhibit C: Big BDM assignment due next week Wednesday. What have I done? Nothing.

In my defense, I have already accomplished a shit load of other things this week. I've run out of steam. I really just want to go to bed. Unfortunately writing complaints on my blog is not helping with anything, it just makes me feel even worse because I've officially wasted 2 hours.